My Testimony, My Path to God...

There comes a time in each of our lives that God reaches his hands out and takes our hands.  For me, this experience changed my life, saved my life...
    I had always believed in God as a child and all through growing up, yet I had no specific religion since my parents were of two different denominations they couldn't agree on where us kids should attend church.
    After many years of rebelling, trying to find my place, and making wrong decisions I finally found the courage to attend college.  My whole life I had been dreaming, like most girls do, of my wedding, my husband etc.  I had dated casually a few times but never seemed to find "The One"
    Until I met a guy, an amazing, wonderful guy, or so I thought he was...
Well, to make a long story short, I dated this man for about a year and a half.  He emotionally and verbally beat me into the ground so far that I didn't even know who I was anymore, he raped me of my self worth, stole my confidence, and made me feel worthless.  I spent all of my days in tears, and my nights completely alone.  He had me convinced that I couldn't live without him, that I was nobody, that I was worthless and crazy, he almost had me convinced to drop out of college even though college has been a life long dream for me.  And then one night my whole situation worsened.  I was in bed sleeping and he came home very very late and drunk.  He woke me up by throwing me out of bed and slamming a door in my face, then he screamed in my face and punched me.  I ran out of the apartment and took off.  Later that day he told me straight to my face that he never touched me, although I had blood on my face, he truly believed he didn't do anything to me.
So...  you would think that I would have been smart enough to leave and stay gone.  NOPE...  I felt that I needed him, that he was my world, my everything, that I wouldn't survive without him...
And then, one night, my whole life changed, my whole world changed, nothing would ever be the same.
I was rushed to the hospital one day due to the fact that I was hemridging.  When the doctors told me that if I had come to the ER any later than I did I wouldn't be here...  well that in itself took my breath away.  I was twenty seven at the time, twenty seven and just got told I should be dead...  something had to change... but it didn't.
A few months later...
I was getting ready to go to school, it was around five am, I had to be up super early because I go to Syracuse University but live an hour away so I commute.  He woke and was in one of his violent moods and began to scream in my face telling me that if I walked out the door that I would never see him again.  I tried to explain I had to go to school and decided to just go, but he pushed the door closed when I opened it.  Again, to make along story short he began to choke me and threw me to floor, forcing himself on top of my sitting on my chest and holding my arms down with his knees, he held his hand tightly over my mouth and I was in fear of my life, I couldn't breath, I couldn't move.  I tried to scream I tried to get away but him weighing 275lbs and me weighing 120lbs, well, it is obvious that I could not.
After I got away I went to stay at my mother's house.  That night as I lay alone in the dark I began to cry, and I cried myself to sleep.  I remember speaking to Jesus for at least two and a half hours, I cried to him that I couldn't get away, that I didn't have the strength to leave this guy, that I needed his strength to get away.  I told him that I was scared and that I needed to get out "Please give me the strength to leave I can't do it without you" is all I kept repeating through my tears.  I sobbed and wept and completely surrendered my life to God that night.  I gave him everything that I am, was, and ever will be. 
The Lord answered my prayers that night and I don't even know how but the next day I woke up and without even thinking went over to the apartment packed my things and left...forever.
When I sit back and reflect on this situation I know now why I went through it all.  I know that due to my experiences I have the knowledge, the empathy, and the compassion to be able to help those who need it.  To help people realize that they are never alone.  I know first hand what it is like to be humiliated, ashamed, frightened, trapped, alone, and to cry everyday seeking to find a way out but never finding it.
I have devoted my life to helping women, men, children, anyone who has been or is in an abusive relationship.  I wil help carry you every step of the way, and sometimes all it takes is a friendly ear to make all the difference.
With Jesus and the Lord, the Holy Spirit and some good friends you CAN change your life, you can begin to see hope, and you WILL feel love.
My name is Kristine Wendt and I am alive today only because of Jesus Christ and his Father God.

And just a quick note...  Because of the emotional turmoil that I had gone through I created the best painting I have ever done in my life...  I am now a senior at SU and am majoring in painting!  I praise God everyday for the strength and grace he has shown me.